The Three Stooges (also known as The Three Stooges: The Movie) is a 2012 American slapstick comedy film based on the film shorts of the mid-20th century comedy trio of the same name. The film was produced, written and directed by the Farrelly brothers and co-written by Mike Cerrone. It stars Chris Diamantopoulos, Sean Hayes, and Will Sasso, re-creating the eponymous characters played by Moe Howard, Larry Fine, and Curly Howard. The film's story places the Stooges in a modern setting. After over a decade of casting problems, principal photography took place from May to July 2011. The film was released on April 13, 2012.
The Three Stooges | |
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Theatrical release poster | |
Directed by | Bobby Farrelly Peter Farrelly |
Produced by |
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Written by | Mike Cerrone Peter Farrelly Bobby Farrelly |
Based on | The Three Stooges by Norman Maurer and Dick Brown |
Starring |
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Music by | John Debney |
Cinematography | Matthew F. Leonetti |
Edited by | Sam Seig |
Production company |
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Distributed by | 20th Century Fox |
Release date |
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Running time | 92 minutes |
Country | United States |
Language | English |
Budget | $30 million |
Box office | $54.8 million |
Screenplay
The film is composed of three acts, which are referred to as episodes (a reference to how the original Three Stooges short films were packaged for television by Columbia Pictures).
Act / Episode 1: More Orphan Than Not
35 years in the past, the children at the Sisters of Mercy Orphanage are playing soccer with an old soda can in the front yard. But then, Sister Mary-Mengele, the meanest and strictest nun in the orphanage gets their attention by telling them to go inside and do their work. The kids sing "Everybody is Special", but she tells them to shut up and go to work. Later, infant versions of Moe, Larry, and Curly are dumped on the doorstep of the orphanage from an unknown person's car. Ever since, the trio has wreaked havoc in the place, leaving the nuns who run it utterly terrified, especially Sister Mary-Mengele, who has always hated the trio. Ten years later, out of desperation, when a prospective couple comes to adopt, the exasperated nuns bring out the trio as being the only three available, eventually being forced to add a fourth when another boy, Teddy, enters the picture. The couple, the Harters, decides to pick Moe, but when he requests Larry and Curly to join him, he is dropped back off at the orphanage, and they choose Teddy instead.
25 years later, in the present, the trio are adults, still living at the orphanage and working as maintenance men. Monsignor Ratliffe arrives to give everyone an important message. After Monsignor Ratliffe tells Mother Superior that the orphanage is going to close, she tells Sister Mary-Mengele to get the trio. However, the trio accidentally injures Sister Mary-Mengele when she tells them that Mother Superior needs them. They head to Mother Superior until another one of their accidents causes Monsignor Ratliffe to fall on top of the nuns. Monsignor Ratliffe gets attacked by Moe, Larry, and Curly, who think that Monsignor Ratliffe was getting fresh with the nuns. Eventually, Monsignor Ratliffe informs everyone that the orphanage will be forced to close down unless they can come up with $830,000 in 30 days. The trio volunteers to go out and try to raise the money somehow. Some of the nuns think that they will not be able to succeed because the only people they know are nuns and kids, but Mother Superior thinks otherwise.
Act / Episode 2: The Bananas Split
A subplot involves a woman named Lydia, who wants to kill her husband so she can be with her lover, Mac, and inherit her husband's considerable fortune. She then finds the trio and offers to pay them the money they need to take care of the hit job. They botch the job by letting Curly push Mac (the supposed husband) in front of a bus and leave Mac in traction in the hospital. When they try to visit Mac in the hospital to finish the job, they are chased by the cops throughout the hospital and escape by jumping off the roof using a fire hose. They end up running into a now grown-up Teddy, who invites them to his anniversary party, but Moe refuses. It turns out that Teddy is actually Lydia's husband. Their next scheme for raising the money is selling farm-raised salmon, with them scattering salmon on a golf range and watering them like produce. But the same cops from the hospital arrive at the golf course to arrest them and the trio gets chased off the golf course and they hide in an old building (getting in by using Curly as a battering ram to bust down the door), where they have a slapstick fight. Larry then stops the fight, and he and Curly then scold Moe for rejecting Teddy's invitation and Teddy's father's earlier adoption attempt; they could have used his adoptive parents' wealth to help save the orphanage. Moe angrily yells at them by telling them that he doesn't care and also saying that he didn't need them. After deciding to split up, they leave the old building, with Moe left inside alone. Then it turns out that they were all on stage in front of an audition crew who select Moe to be the newest cast member of Jersey Shore as "Dyna-Moe".
Final Act / Episode 3: No Moe Mister Nice Guy
Larry and Curly are getting along well without Moe, but they return to the orphanage, where they find out a girl named Murph is very ill but has not been taken to the hospital because the orphanage has no medical insurance. Sister Mary-Mengele tells them that no one will insure the orphanage due to the trio's numerous accidents and injuries over the years, and the $830,000 is needed in order to cover medical bills that accumulated over the years. Larry and Curly later meet up with Teddy's adopted father at his office to talk about what happened with the orphanage. Teddy's father confesses that Moe wanted him to go back for his friends to adopt them and he didn't want to so he gave Moe back and took Teddy in his place. Then Larry and Curly discover a picture of Teddy and Mr. Harter with Lydia and Mac and realize that Teddy is the husband that Lydia wanted to murder. In addition to this, they feel guilty for rebuking Moe in not accepting the Harter's adoption and decide to go find him.
Meanwhile, Moe has been causing a lot of havoc on Jersey Shore by slapping the cast members around and not putting up with their spoiled antics. The cast goes to the producer and tells him to kick Moe off of the show or sue him. The producer then informs them that the show is all about ratings… NOT them. Larry and Curly finally go to the set of Jersey Shore to reunite with Moe and they all head to the anniversary party where they show up to thwart the murder plot, getting in as balloon men. When they get inside, Curly gives all the balloons to a little girl and she floats up into the air. Later, they get chased by the angry Lydia and Mac after the same girl's balloons are popped and she falls onto the wedding cake, destroying it. Moe, Larry, and Curly are chased into Teddy's bedroom, finding Teddy on the bed, drowsy. Mac then draws a gun on the trio, but Teddy's dad appears and tells Mac to put his gun down. Mac then says Lydia was "calling the shots", but Teddy's dad confesses that he was "calling the shots". The trio then realizes that Mr. Harter was the real mastermind and Lydia was working for him. He married into the money and was incensed to find out the money was left to Teddy and not him when Teddy's mother died years earlier. They are taken for a ride, but the car crashes into the water when Curly's pet rat Nippy distracts them; then, they all escape when Curly passes gas, and they light it with "waterproof, strike-anywhere matches" that Larry had, causing enough of an explosion to blow out the windows. Once they are back on land, Mr. Harter, Lydia, and Mac are arrested, and Teddy thanks the trio for saving him. When the trio requests the $830,000 from Teddy, he declines, stating he refuses to help the same orphanage that gave him up to a father that tried to kill him, as well as sending him to military school when he was 7, among other things over the years.
A couple months later, the trio return to the now-condemned/abandoned orphanage. They then start crying for feeling like failures, but then they hear kids laughing, swimming and playing. When they investigate, they find out a whole brand new orphanage was built next door, complete with a swimming pool, a basketball court, and a tennis court. They soon learn that the money came from the Jersey Shore's producers who consider this as an advance payment in relation to a new reality show, Nuns vs. Nitwits, in which the entire trio will take part. Murph is revealed to be perfectly fine and her illness was due to poison in the cheese (really from rat traps in the attic), though Larry has always suspected it was from too much iron in the water. Then she, along with her friends, brothers Peezer and Weezer (the latter thought to have been lost forever to a foster home), will be adopted by Teddy and his new fiancee, Ling, who was Teddy's father's secretary. In the end, after causing one more incident (namely, Curly accidentally knocking Sister Mary-Mengele into the pool with a folded-up diving board, causing the sister to scream, "I'm gonna mash your heads like potatoes!!"), the trio run away and bounce off trampolines out of the orphanage and onto some mules, on which they ride away from the orphanage, off into the distance.
Post-script epilogue
An epilogue consists of two actors playing Bobby and Peter Farrelly, explaining that the stunts were all done by professionals, showing the foam rubber props used in the film for the trio to hit one another, demonstrating the fake eye-poke trick (to the eyebrows), and advising children not to try any of the stunts at home.
During the end credits, a music video plays showing the Stooges and Sister Rosemary performing "It's a Shame", originally recorded by The Spinners in 1970, interspersed with excerpts from deleted scenes and a couple of brief outtakes. Though credited to "The Spinners and The Three Stooges", Hudson's own distinctive vocals can also be heard.
- Chris Diamantopoulos as Moe, the aggressive and short-tempered leader of the Stooges.
- Skyler Gisondo as young Moe
- Sean Hayes as Larry, the smartest and most relaxed member of the Stooges.
- Lance Chantiles-Wertz as young Larry
- Will Sasso as Curly, the goofy and dim-witted member of the Stooges.
- Robert Capron as young Curly
- Jane Lynch as Mother Superior, the head nun of the orphanage the Stooges grew up in.
- Kirby Heyborne as Theodore J. "Teddy" Harter, a long-lost friend of the Stooges who they met at the orphanage.
- Stephen Collins as Mr. Harter, Teddy's adoptive father, who is a lawyer that married into money, rather than love. He had originally wanted to adopt Moe, but when he insisted that he returns & adopt Larry and Curly, he dropped him back off at the orphanage & took Teddy in his place. He wants to murder his adopted son out of spite because his late wife & Teddy's deceased mother both left their inheritance to him, rather than himself.
- Sofía Vergara as Lydia Harter who was Teddy's wife that wanted to exploit the stooges. She wants to murder him in order to gain his inheritance. She hates the trio for thwarting her plans to murder Teddy.
- Craig Bierko as Mac Mioski, Lydia's lover, and henchman.
- Larry David as Sister Mary-Mengele, a bad-tempered nun at the orphanage, who has a massive grudge against the Stooges.
- Jennifer Hudson as Sister Rosemary, a nun who works at the orphanage.
- Brian Doyle-Murray as Monsignor Ratliffe.
- Lin Shaye as Nursery Nurse, a nurse who works at the hospital.
- Caitlin Colford as Katilyn, a nurse who first notices the Stooges when they first come to the orphanage.
- Carly Craig as Mrs. Harter, Mr. Harter's wife who adopted Teddy and leaves the entire inheritance to Teddy over her husband.
- Kate Upton as Sister Bernice, a nun at the orphanage.
- Marianne Leone as Sister Ricarda, a nun at the orphanage.
- Avalon Robbins as Murph, a sick girl at the orphanage who is a friend of the Stooges.
- Max Charles as Peezer, Murph's best friend and a friend of the Stooges.
- Reid Meadows as Weezer, Peezer's brother; adopted by Teddy
- Emy Coligado as Ling, Mr. Harter's secretary who eventually becomes Teddy's second wife.
- Isaiah Mustafa as Ralph, a producer for Jersey Shore.
- Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi as herself.
- Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino as himself.
- Jennifer "JWoww" Farley as herself.
- Ronnie Ortiz-Magro as himself.
- Samantha "Sweetheart" Giancola as herself.
- Justin Lopez as Peter Farrelly, Bobby's older brother and co-director of the film.
- Antonio Sabàto, Jr. as Bobby Farrelly, Peter's younger brother and co-director of the film.
- Dwight Howard as himself, a basketball player who teaches at the new orphanage.
Development and writing
A Three Stooges film set in the modern day had been in development since at least the mid-1990s; Mad About You creator Danny Jacobson wrote and developed a version in 1997 that had Phil Hartman attached to play Moe. Conundrum Entertainment's Bradley Thomas became attached to The Three Stooges around 2000 with Columbia Pictures. In March 2001, Warner Bros. bought the feature rights from C3 Entertainment and Peter and Bobby Farrelly
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